37: After So Little Time

Sean

     After going to my hotel room for a few minutes to finish cleaning myself up, I head out to a club I noticed while driving around the other day. I can't stay in that damn hotel room all night by myself with nothing to do but watch bad TV and stare at the walls.

    I get inside and revel in the semidarkness as I make my way over to the bar. I want something strong enough to drown out the guilt I'm feeling.

     'Just let him beat the shit out of you, didn't you?' my subconscious taunts me, referring to that rebound guy and what happened on his front porch.

       I knew it was a long shot for Erin to even want to talk to me while she was around that guy, but I thought I'd try anyway. Then me and my big mouth. I got angry and talked about his kid.

       The bartender takes my order while I stare in the mirror at the small crowd reflected behind him. I hate being here by myself.

      'She's never coming back to you. You screwed up big time.' Again, my subconscious taunts me.

      Meredith isn't even that pretty.

      The bartender hands me my drink, and I decide to have a seat to watch people dance.

      I miss Erin, I think with gut-wrenching pain.

      This trip didn't turn out anywhere near what I'd hoped. I'd thought for sure her leaving town was a way of her asking me to chase her, which I gladly did. I get it; I deserved a little punishment. But no! She really left. She says she likes her new life here.

       She can't possibly be in love with that guy, I think, ignoring the fact that I know she'd never say that if it wasn't true. She just said that to make me leave her alone.

       'Maybe you should.'

       I wish my subconscious would shut the hell up. I mean come on! I was the one to finally get that girl to come out of her shell!

       My memory drifts back to Josh's party, our first date. Damn, she was hot. And uncomfortable. I couldn't let her be a mousy little coward forever... and that dress her cousin in Champs les Sims bought her... I inwardly groan with the memory. THAT'S when the rest of the team saw what I'd already seen. I laugh quietly. They thought I was performing some random act of kindness for asking out a nerd.

      I saw her first. I made her what she is, and I'll be damned if I wound up doing it for him!

    "Hey stranger," a velvety voice says just before the owner herself sits in the chair opposite me. "Why you sitting here all by yourself?"

      I look over at the moderately-attractive woman, and I mentally shrug. What harm can come from a little flirting, especially if Erin is being difficult?

      "Waiting for someone like you to come lift my spirits," I answer and pout a little. She leans forward; it looks to be working.

      "What's eating you?" she asks, still leaning forward so that she can hear me better. Or something. Well, whatever reason it is, I'm enjoying the view.

       "I've been dumped," I answer evasively. I finish my drink real fast, brighten up my expression, and say, "But I'm not going to let it get me down. Wanna dance?"

       "Sure," she says, and I take her offered hand and pull her behind me to the middle of the dance floor.

 ------------------------

Erin

     Kind of like Bryce was earlier, I'm shaking. I don't want to break down in front of Adele. Bryce tightens his arms around me, and I'm so grateful. I bury my face into his shoulder and work on trying not to scream with anger, hurt, and frustration. He doesn't try to get me to talk. Instead, he addresses his daughter.
     "Adele, I'm sorry you had to see what I just did. I... lost it," he tells her.
     "All he did was call me a brat. I don't care," she responds.
     "I do," he says, and the two of them get quiet again. "That doesn't excuse the fact that I was that violent because I want you to know that's not always the answer."
     "I get it," she says in an almost annoyed voice. Then she asks more quietly, "So, that was the ex?"
     "Yes," he answers, and I wonder how much he's told her. "And that's all the more reason for Erin to stay with us until he leaves."
     "It's fine, Daddy. I get it. He needs to leave her alone if she wants him to."
     I start crying. She just... said it so simply! So uncomplicated! If only life worked like that. I sniff and then feel the two of them looking at me.

     "It's okay, Erin," Adele tells me after she walks up and puts her hand on my shoulder. "Daddy won't let him get to you again," she says like her Daddy is her hero. Well, he's my hero too. "I'm going to go put the pizza away, I guess," she tells Bryce.
     "Did you do your homework?" he asks her in his parent voice.
     Adele sighs exasperatedly, and I can imagine her rolling her eyes at him. "No. I guess I'll go do that too." She's quiet for a few seconds before she says, "It's going to be okay, Erin."
     "Okay," I whisper back to her through my tears.
     The second the door closes, Bryce holds me tighter. I feel so guilty. I can feel his breath on my shoulder and his scruffy, perpetual five o'clock shadow against my ear.
      "I'm sorry," I whisper to him.
      "You don't have anything to be sorry about," he says soothingly.
      I nod against his collarbone. "Yes I do. I pretty much told you to get lost so I could talk to him... something you'd already told him wasn't going to happen."

      "Oh that," he says. "Well, don't worry about it. You made up for it the second you told him what you told him." He lightly kisses my shoulder before deciding to just run his mouth against it and up to my ear where he breathes in deeply.
      "Told him what exactly?" I ask.
      He takes another deep breath, and I can hear the restrained emotion in his voice as he tells me, "That you love me more than you ever loved him." Since my ear is pressed up against him, I can hear his heartbeat increase its tempo.
      "Oh," I say quietly. Well, it's true... He heard me?
      "That wasn't a lie to just get him to leave was it?" he asks, now sounding insecure.
      "I wouldn't lie about something like that. He knows that," I answer and wish that Bryce knew that. Maybe hearing me tell Sean made it finally sink in.
      This is the part where I would get mad at him for his insecurities, but after this morning, I think I understand a little better. He never got over Ashley leaving, and he might just be more screwed up than I am since he apparently never dealt with it. I just have to keep reminding myself to look at everything through that 'filter,' and I should be able to understand him better. I don't know how I got that from just a kiss... but it was the way he held me that made me catch on. That and the crying.
     He exhales harshly and turns my face towards his before he passionately kisses me.
     "How is it..." he asks in little breaks in the kiss, "...that you... mean so much to me... after so little time?" Then he pulls back to look at me and takes off my glasses to gently fold them and put them on the bedside table. That action, thankfully, gives me time to take in what he just said. I can't help but shed a few happy tears now; I'm an emotional wreck.
     When he's returned his gaze back to me, he reaches for my cheeks and wipes away the traces of my tears. I get momentarily lost in those warm brown eyes of his.
      "You're dangerous without your glasses on," he says quietly down to me.
      His statement throws me a little, and I can't help but find it funny in spite of everything we've gone through today. I find myself smiling as I ask him why.
      "Because your eyes are the most beautiful shade of blue I've ever seen," he answers, and I feel glad I'm not standing because I don't know how well my knees would hold up under that gaze. As it is, I sit up a little to voraciously kiss him.
      He pauses for a moment in quiet shock, and I, of course, revel in that moment. He deserves a 'shock' like this after the things he just told me. It doesn't last long, however, and he starts kissing me back. I want to laugh at the way he acts like he needs to kiss me more passionately than I'm kissing him. I feel like we're having a contest to see who can out-kiss the other one. I want to win.
       Bryce groans just before leaving my mouth for my neck, but I'm not finished with him. "Oh no you don't," I say and grab hold of his chin to pull his mouth back up to mine. He lets out a little whine/groan, and I know I've won. Good.
      He is... way too damn hot in nothing but these old jeans, I think as I remember how I wanted to practically attack him down in the kitchen earlier. Do they have to fit him like that? Then to just... casually lean on the door frame like he did. Holy shit!
      I work myself so that I'm straddling him with his legs hanging off the side of the bed. I know we need to talk, but right now I don't want to stop kissing him. He keeps trying to break free to probably kiss me elsewhere, but I'm not having it right now.
     A small growl escapes him after I thwart another of his attempts to leave my mouth. One of his arms flies around my waist, holding me closer to him, while the opposite hand reaches up to almost-roughly grab my breast. When his hand starts kneading me, it's my turn to groan, and it's not long until I have to break the kiss to catch my breath.

      The arm around my waist pulls me tighter up on him and a little higher as well before his hand pushes my breast up so that it comes more out of the top of my shirt. His mouth triumphantly attacks the exposed area, and his arm tightens around my waist to stop my mild squirming when his tongue dips down into my cleavage. His other arm takes over for the one holding my waist so he can undo my braid before he lifts me up only to deposit me on my back upon the unmade sheets, my legs still on either side of him.

      He pushes himself upwards off of my cleavage to once again posses my mouth. I can feel his erection straining against the thin material of his jeans as he presses himself against me there. Surprising me, we both groan at the same time when he starts teasing me with suggestive movements of his hips.
      Having been denied last night and him driving me crazy all afternoon, I'm about ready to explode with suppressed need. I reach up and grab fistfuls of his hair. I decide I love longer hair on guys; it gives me something else to hang onto.
     I'm shaking for quite another reason than I was just a few minutes ago, and I hear myself groan as I think, Oh shit, Bryce. PLEASE don't stop.

     "I desperately need to make love to you right now, Erin," he says soft and low without stopping. My breathing spikes as my nails rake across his chest, shoulders, back, and wherever else I can immediately get to. "But it's almost Adele's bedtime. And I want to take my time with you."
      I let out something between a whimper and a whine. No! Don't leave me like this! I think in a mild panic.
      I can feel his eyes watching me. "However... shall I make you come like this?"
      "Yes," I whisper. Don't worry, it won't take long! I think as he groans and increases the pressure. His tempo also increases the tiniest amount, and I'm about to come apart at the seams. It's all I can do to keep from screaming.
      He must be able to sense that because his mouth claims mine in a demanding kiss. I'm very close now.
      Before I expect it, however, my hips curl towards him in a surprisingly-powerful climax that gives me torturous aftershocks.
       "Oh, baby," he whispers as he does what he can to force as much out of my aftershocks as possible.

      When we've been still and quiet for a few minutes, he brings me back to the here and now just enough to tell me, "I'll just tell Adele that you're resting." There's a small smirk on his face. I love that smirk. That smirk means he's happy he's made me feel so damn good. I'll return the favor somehow... just as soon as I can get the energy.
      He kisses me chastely once before chuckling and getting up to go do the bedtime ritual thing with Adele. I don't know how he's going to hide his physical state from her. The next time I think about it and want to inquire, I notice I must've missed some time because the bed is empty.
      All that with my clothes on.