92: In There Somewhere

Erin

      I give Bryce a look when I get back to the house that he'd better interpret as 'get inside; we need to talk.'

      "Got tired of being the third wheel?" Bryce asks me belligerently as he walks behind me in the hallway to the kitchen. He'd been outside helping Adele with a lemonade stand. Adele wanted to start it yesterday to distract herself from thinking about Pam, but she also wanted to help with watching Jeremy. Pam got released from the hospital last night, and Simon came by this morning wanting to pick up his baby boy. Pam is doing much better; she's just very tired.

       I fantasize about smacking Bryce's smart-aleck mouth. Remembering what Marie told me over the phone, I say, "From what I've heard, you seemed to enjoy it." I finally turn to face him since we've entered the kitchen.

       Bryce grins wickedly and leans up against the dishwasher with his arms folded in front of him. "Depends. If the chick was hot enough, yeah. We'd take turns." He grins wider when he sees my blush that I can't stop from happening.

       "You… you did…" I can't finish because I can't raise my jaw for a long enough period of time to speak. I don't know what I expected, but I don't think I expected him to admit it outright.

       "What? I'm not going to lie. That could come back and really bite me in the ass, so yeah, I did enjoy it." He rubs the back of his neck and watches me closely.

       The way he looks at me causes my insides to clench tight as he straightens from leaning against the stove. He looks so hot. He takes a few, slow steps toward me. I still can't pick my jaw up.

       "Why are you surprised? Why is this so hard to believe? None of this should shock you," he says, and I jump when he reaches a hand up to stroke my cheek.

       I force the wheels in my head to start turning again. "The bra thing was actually kind of funny in like a college frat party kind of way, but…"

       "I read your book, Erin, so don't go trying to play the innocent on me," he says quiet and low.

       "Writing and doing are two very different things," I offer as a comeback.

       He squints and tilts his head as he tries to figure me out. "If you can write about it, then that kinky-as-shit person is in there somewhere."

       I wish I could keep myself from shaking. I know he can feel it now that his arms surround me like a cage.

       "Chill," he says and quickly kisses my parted lips. "I'm only saying don't be surprised. Oh, and don't go thinking that I'll do that with you. Like hell am I going to share you."

       "I wasn't quite thinking that. I'm just trying to picture it in my mind."

       "Getting ideas?" he asks with a mischievous grin.

       I playfully hit him. "It's like seeing another you. I mean, I knew, or I should've known."

       His fingertips lovingly stroke my cheekbone, and I feel it all the way through the bone like a pleasantly warm massage. "Should've known? I'll tell you anything you want to know."

       My head shakes quickly as I try to clear my mind. I have to ask. As he says, I do have a creative imagination. All kinds of scenarios play out in my head in a matter of seconds, and I have to know. "Did you sleep with Jesse?"

       "No," he answers me evenly, and his hand continues its journey across my face.

       "Bryce," I gasp, not able to focus on anything else anymore, "your hands…" How do I tell him this? How do I tell him I think he has some kind of 'love touch'? I don't think Bryce is a 'freak after a long line of witches' like he told me.

        His brown eyes smile at me warmly, and I want to drown in them. "What about my hands?" His voice vibrates like he said it inside me.

        I've felt this before, this feeling like he's touching me deeper than my skin, but now it's gotten more powerful. How?

        All he's doing is touching my face, and I wanna rip his clothes off.

       "Daddy, I had my first customer!" Adele says happily when she walks into the kitchen. "They gave me a whole simolean!"

      Bryce turns around and beams down at his daughter. "Awesome! We'll have to frame it. If you want, that is."

       "Yes! Can we do it now?"

       He chuckles. "Then what about the rest of your stock? It'll all go bad if you let it sit there too long."

       Adele's drink stand faces outward towards the beach. I know the businessman side of Bryce is busting his buttons with pride.

       He turns back to me, quickly kisses me, and takes Adele's hand as they go back outside to work on her stand some more. I hold onto the counter for support, still not recovered.

Jesse

       I walk into my still-very-empty house after Erin drops me off.

       I'd better find something to do and fast.

      I decide to work in my office for a little while. There are things I could get done, but they're not urgent. I suppose I could do them now. Anything to keep from thinking about Marie.
      Back at her house earlier, I'd decided that I really need to back off. Marie attacks when she feels threatened, and she felt threatened by me just being there. Damn, that hurts.
     I deserve it. I really fucked up.
     Okay, so I'll totally back off and keep things as simple as an ordinary beginning relationship.

       The next day, I go to work. Business goes great, and I love that I can immerse myself into my job and not think about Marie… until I think about the fact that I'm not thinking about her.

      Simple. Simple simple simple. I can do simple. I don't have to be attached at the hip to her.

      Can I call her today? I ask myself before deciding that it's too early to call her.

      My phone shows no missed calls or texts. Obviously, she's doing better with this beginning-type relationship.

      She could call me. Text me. Come by for a visit! But I don't want to push her anymore.

      Coming home from work three days after my fight with Marie, I see from my bedroom window her scooter parked next to Erin's. I curse quietly because I'd planned on calling her right now, but I don't want to interrupt her time with her friend.

      While I make myself some dinner, I frequently look over at Bryce's house to try and see if Marie has left yet. I can't see as well from downstairs as I can from upstairs, but I do make out the upper part of her handlebars.

      I sit facing his house. She's in there somewhere, probably eating dinner.

      There's always New Year's…

     At nine o'clock, I call her. She sounds stiff and distant… and hurt. I refrain from asking if I can come over. My arms ache to hold her, but I know I have to keep my distance for a while. This will work. This can work. This is what she needs. She needs to get over what's-his-name without some idiot doing crazy shit to her.

     "What are you doing New Year's Eve?" I ask, and I get a song in my head.

     "Erin and Bryce have invited me to their house, but I won't go if you'd rather be there instead," she answers, stabbing me. She doesn't want to be there if I'm there too.

     Of course, I've forgotten all about how I'd told her I don't want to be around her for a while because it hurts too much. All I can think about is how she sounds like she doesn't want to be around me.

     "Oh," I say, trying to sound calm and in control, "I don't want you to have to change your plans if you don't want to. I can always go hang out at Hurricane. They usually throw a huge party. Bryce does too at The Flamingo, but of course, not this year since it's closed." Am I rambling?

      "It's opening sooner than expected," she tells me.

      "Nice," I say and clear my throat. Crap. Then you'll be working nights. I know you will. You'll be head waitress.

      "Mhm," she agrees, sounding like Erin for a second, "and Bryce has asked me to help hire a few new people soon. Though what good I'll do, I don't know."

       I take a deep breath, but it doesn't fill the hole inside me. "He probably wants your input since you might be helping to train them." At least we're talking.

       "Moi?" she asks with a little laugh, and I hold my phone with both hands at the sound of it. I miss you! "I only worked there a few weeks."

       "And you were awesome." Oh god, this small talk is going to kill me! I scream in my head at the little pause in conversation.

      "Are you… okay?" she asks in a careful voice.

       Only because I know you need this. I shrug as I stand here to help out my act as I say, "Yeah. Sure." Well, technically I'm healthy with no outstanding debt. I have a great job that I actually like when it doesn't come to the paperwork. I have great friends. When you take all that into account, it's not a lie.

       Another long, awkward pause occurs as I tell myself not to beg to come over.

       "You should go to Bryce's on New Year's Eve," she says quietly, and I read that as 'Come because I want to see you but with Erin and Bryce as a buffer.'

      I smile a real smile, and it feels strange. "Okay," I say happily. At least I'll get to see her.

      Our phone conversation doesn't last too much longer, and we hang up after wishing the other one goodnight.

      I go to Bryce's on New Year's Eve, and Marie doesn't show, not even after Erin calls her and tries to talk her into it.